Gargamel's Keep

[Gargamel]

In the northern lands Enedwaith, along the border of Arnor, in a long since abandoned Dunedain ruin, lives Gargamel the Horrible. A slightly dim-witted wizard whom believes he has been sent by the Valar to rid the lands of Middle Earth of little evil blue fairies. He lives alone, save for his cat, Azrael, and spend most days chasing down little blue figments of his imagination.

[Boobers]

It was a beautiful day in the lands of Enedwaith and Boobers was walking idly beneath the trees of the great kingdom, admiring the scenery and listening to the whimsical calls of the birds. As the path became broader and wider it opened up upon an old Arnorien Camp that had fallen after the decay of the United Kingdom. At its center was a large wooden keep, rotten in appearance with many knotholes and loose boarding.

Idly he began to approach, the fat on his calves and thighs shaking wonderfully, causing many rolls of round succulent fat to form. The sun shone lightly upon his skin, illuminating his pink flesh, the black body hairs shining in a dazzling aray of radiance and light. His head turned here and there as his beedy eyes looked upon the natural beauty of Enedwaith and a yellow smile crawled from his grizzly beard, still housing hundreds of droplets of water that shined in multicolor beauty after his visit to the local watering hole.

Slowly but surely he came upon the front door of the great keep. It became apparent immediately that the foundations were off key due to the slight tilting of the upper rafters. He did not knock but rather he simply entered, pushing the door open and entering the dark chambers. He looked around swiftly, noticing a few stray aticles of furniture, a cat, and a small hunched little man. He walked in and found his way to a small stool, seating himself beneath the torch light.

The room was warm and humid and alread sweat began to creep the folds of fat beneath his loin cloth. He crudely stood and lifted the cloth, inserting his hand under one of the flaps and wiping it dry. He brought his hand to his face and inhaled deeply, taking in the aroma of his sweat while the little wizard mumbled about blue little fairies.

[Gargamel]

Gargamel wasi intently scouring over some old, stained parchments and was unaware of Boobers' entrance into his home. Azrael, however, watched curiously as the strange fat man entered as sat upon the stool. The cat lept from her perch upon the rafter above and purred as she rubbed her head head against the man's girthy legs, arching her back, tail curling. Whe the large fellow lifted his loin cloth, Azrael sniffed curiously, then hissed and swatted at the foul odor before scurrying away, leaping onto Gargamel's desk and sending his blank parchments flying across the room.

Gargamel cursed the cat as one of the blank papers drifted towards the torch above Boobers' head. He rushed frantically, to save the sheet of parchment, arms flailing in the air. In his desperate attempt to save what the thought was a map to the cursed Blue Fairies home he did not see huge mass of a man sitting on the stool and ran right into him, falling back as he bounced off the man.

He pushed himself up, rubbing his head, mumbling, the dashed forward again as he saw the burning paper on the floor before him. In his effort to extinguish the blaze he ripped the paper appart, the burnt pieces crumbling in his hand.

He burried his face in his hands, crying over his loss, and mumbling more curses at Azrael, whom had resumed her nap on the rafters above. Then the sound of Boobers' flagelence startled him. He raised his head and sniffed the air. "What could this be. Some foul trickery of the ...." He turned and saw Boobers sitting upon the stool, seemingly abliss to anything other than the booger he was furiously trying to remove from his nose.

Gargamel stood and backed away. This man was surely an assasin sent by the the leader of the Blue Fairies. The one with the red hat had long been trying to kill him. Gargamel would not be out witted by this fellow though. Despite the man's obvious talent at stealth and sneakiness (demonstrated by his ability to sneak up on him), Gargamel would out smarth this assasin and have him lead him straight to the blue fairies.

He cleared his throat, drumming his fingers together as he crazily at Boobers. "Welcome, friend, what brings you to these parts?" He snickered as he asked, knowing already that the fairies had sent him, but tried to play it off as a coughing spell. He couldn't let the asassain know that he knew of his mission.

[Boobers]

Boober's belted a jovial laugh as a large mass of some amorphous green substance was flung from his left nostril and landed squarely upon Gargamel's forehead. He smiled moved a large hand to the small wizard's forehead and pressed it against the green substance that had filmed over the creases. Gargamel looked up in absolute horror as the mucus was pressed against his forehead tightly, the outsides of it pressed upwards by the force, and then pulled away. Boober's inspected it with gleeful eyes, bringing his finger towards the light of a candle trying to inspect the insides of the transparent mystery. With a jolly smile of satisfaction he thrusted the finger into his mouth and closed his lips tightly around it, pulling the appendage from his lips as to trap the mucus within his mouth. He swallowed deeply and rubbed the most hand along Gargemel's patched cloak again and again as not to be ridden of some loathesome burden but rather to share something he treasured with a dear friend. At Gargamel's look of disgust and contempt for the hairy giant, he smiled thinking nothing more of it than the little man's way of expressing gratitude.

[Gargamel]

Gargamel, muttered under his breath, "Oh, my" as the robust man sucked the green glob from his finger. He rubbed his forhead furiously with the back of his hand, removing the slimy residue. The asassin was obviously trying to intimidate him, but Gargamel would not cower in to his threats. His bushy eyebrows furrowed, making one large furry 'v' over his eyes. "I know who sent you here. Take me to the one with the red hat and I shall spare your life!" He pulled his wand from his tattered robe and pointed the twig at the barbarian. "Defy me and I shall turn you into some hideous beast!"

[Boobers]

Boobers flashed a bright grin once more and slowly took the little thicket from Gargamel's hands and inspected it with curious eyes. After a careful analyses he turned his gaze back down towards Gargamel eyeing his unibrow with utmost enjoyment. Without so much as a word he lifted the twig to his mouth and inserted it between to spaced teeth. Gargamel stared in horror, mouth a'gape as Boobers used his wand as a toothpick. Boobers pulled the twig from his mouth, a remnant of the mucus he had eating, clinging to the tip. Boobers reached forward with large hairy hands and opened Gargemel's own small wrinkled hands, placing the wand in his palm and manually closing the fingers tightly around it. With a jovial smile he patted Gargamel on the head and began to hum an off key tune that seemed to be more of a combination of random grunts -and sometimes burps- that Boobers was constructing off the top of his head.

[Gargamel]

Gargamel let out a yelp in pain as Boobers crushed his fingers together. He cursed loudly and incoherently at the man. He shook the twig that was his 'wand' furiously, sending slobber flying across the room to land on Boobers' head. The fat man look up in wonder as the droplets hit him and his grunting changed to a happy cooing. Gargamel, seeing that the assasin would not be intimidated by his imense power of sorcery, turned his attention away and started scouring through a book of spells, searching for one pertinent to his situation.